My first Men’s workshop
A story by TNT facilitator Diesel:
Since beginning my spiritual journey more than 40 years ago, I have attended countless workshops about men and masculinity.
- Finding Your Inner Wild Man.
- Into the Wild.
- The Way of the Superior Man.
- And many more.
Each time, I came with the same hope.
I wanted to discover the answer to an important question:
How do I truly become a man?
And perhaps even more importantly:
How do I navigate the intensity of intimate relationships?
Often, I would leave these workshops feeling empowered. I felt connected to my strength, my confidence, and my masculinity.
But then I would come home.
The moment I stepped back into the arms of my girlfriend or wife, much of that certainty seemed to disappear.
Where had the power gone?
What happened to the strong sense of self I had experienced only days before?
Then came my first TNT Men’s Workshop. It was in 2013.
I was excited. But if I am honest, I was also secretly terrified.
I had already completed Levels 1 & 2 Sexual Deconditioning and the Level 4 Transmission Training with TNT, so I knew I was probably stepping into something intense.
Those trainings had already confronted me with my not-so-small spiritual ego. They had also introduced me to the depth and intensity of the Crazy Wisdom approach.
What struck me immediately during the Men’s workshop introduction by Alex(a) Vartman was the focus.
It was not mainly about what men need to change about themselves.
Instead, he spoke about the importance of understanding the feminine dynamics that live within all of us.
He spoke about how the feminine often seeks security, connection, control, or validation in particular ways.
More importantly, he showed us that when we learn to recognise these dynamics within ourselves, we can respond differently.
We can meet the parts of ourselves that feel needy, wounded, afraid, or controlling with greater awareness and compassion.
This was completely different from anything I had encountered before.
And it resonated deeply.
To be honest, I had never fully understood what it meant to be a man.
Many men find value in reconnecting with their primal nature. Dancing around campfires. Drumming. Expressing their wildness.
I appreciate that.
But for me, it never quite gave me the answers I was looking for.
After that first Men’s Workshop, something fundamental shifted in the way I related to the feminine. Both within myself and in others.
I began to develop more compassion, empathy, and understanding for the underlying pain and patterns that so often create conflict and suffering.
As a result, navigating challenges in my relationship became significantly easier.
And the benefits did not stop there.
They began to influence many other areas of my life as well.
So this is a small shout-out to any man who feels he could use some practical tools, deeper understanding, and a fresh perspective on relationships and life.
Especially if you’re tired of getting trapped in the familiar reactions of:
“I can fix this.”
Or:
“What the fuck is happening?”
Reactions that many of us know all too well.
When is the next Men’s Workshop, you ask?
I hope to see you there.
Onwards & upwards,
Diesel, TNT Team
